PORTSIDER

Catch of the Week

2008-06-27T19:23:00.003-05:00

Ashley hauled in this massive seventeen inch Kentucky bass on Wednesday morning in some deep water on Table Rock Lake here in Missouri. One of only two caught during the week, it was easily the source of greatest excitement as far as fishing goes. Ashley will be appearing on Babe Winkelman's program next week where she'll show viewers a few tricks the pros use.

World's Best Root Beer

2008-06-25T10:59:00.002-05:00

The NY Times today examines the root beer universe and determines the number one brew comes from Wisconsin's Sprecher:

Our No. 1 root beer, from Sprecher in Wisconsin, a wonderfully balanced and complex brew, uses a combination of corn syrup and honey, while our No. 2, the restrained and flavorful IBC, uses only corn syrup. So even with the importance of the sweetener, something more is at play with root beers. For me, it was the integration and balance of flavors, which raises the question of what exactly root beer is, anyway. Originally, root beers were more like herbal teas, bitter infusions of roots, vines, herbs and spices, including sarsaparilla, sassafras and licorice. Nowadays, the basic components include anise, wintergreen and vanilla, with the addition, perhaps, of flavors like ginger, cloves and mint. At times, the tasting felt almost like analyzing a medicine cabinet, and indeed, one of the components of the IBC aroma was described by a taster as liniment, no doubt from wintergreen.

For my high school graduation party, I had a keg of Sprecher root beer on hand. Let me tell you, nothing was better than the week following the party when I was able to pour a frosty mug with leftover root beer whenever I wanted.

The Beautiful Game

2008-06-18T16:48:00.008-05:00

My attitude toward soccer has changed considerably over the past decade or so. In high school, I remember railing on the game arguing that it was one of the most boring sports ever created. "That many people can be wrong," I would answer when someone would point out that it is by far the most popular game on Earth.

I started to change my feelings, however, while studying in London and soccer was the only sport regularly accessible on television and in newspapers. In addition, our group of friends got into the habit of playing pick-up soccer games in the park - usually on a Sunday afternoons. I began to see that while watching it could still be dull, playing definitely wasn't.

By 2006, during the World Cup in Germany, my perspective toward soccer had undergone a complete 180. I watched virtually every game of the tournament and continued watching the sport regularly following Arsenal - the team from North London whose home stadium is only a few blocks from London Metropolitan University where I took classes while in college.

In continuing to track the game for the past couple of years, I've had the desire to play the game competitively to take my understanding of the sport to a new level. While I think it's possible to be an avid fan of a sport you've never played, I also believe that having played a sport competitively provides a whole new perspective to being a fan. Take golf for instance: Tiger's 380 yard drives are impressive whether you've played the game or not, but they become amazing when you compare them to the 200 yard slice you hit into the woods, or better yet, the one you crush down the middle, the one that you feel is as perfect as you could ever hit, and it flies a measly 270.

With that spirit in mind, a friend and I decided to join a local soccer league in the area that plays games throughout the summer. Last Sunday was our first game and although our team was defeated six to two, I had a great time. Through playing, the most striking similarity I've found is that between soccer and basketball - especially while breaking toward the goal. The thought processes the mind engages in while dribbling the soccer ball are much more like playing basketball than I'd considered in the past. While my soccer skills certainly are in their infancy, I've been able to hold my own for the most part. I'm looking forward to future games and am crossing my fingers that I'll be able to avoid serious injury.

Garage Sale Day One

2008-06-13T16:37:00.003-05:00

The opening day of the garage sale is almost complete and according to Ashley, "It was definitely successful." Highlights of the day include:

1) Selling our couches downstairs to a fellow whose entire basement was flooded. His mother actually purchased the couch and one of his friends came later in the afternoon to pick up the sofa and loveseat with a trailer. His home in Fond du Lac, his mother explained, was completely flooded and the water was up to the ceiling in his basement.

2) Ashley's sale of a picture she bought a few weekends ago for two dollars and moving it for ten dollars today. That's a profit margin of 500% folks!

3) A lady wondering if our road had a Piggly Wiggly on it and then asking us for directions to the nearest one.

Beautification of the Grounds

2008-06-13T10:38:00.004-05:00

The brief hiatus from blogging a few weeks back was due to a fairly large landscaping project we undertook around our house. Work included laying a row of brick to divide the rock and lawn, adding new rock, refreshing mulch, and planting new shrubs and flowers. A huge thanks to my parents who expertly helped us in the process!

Because we created a new dividing line a foot or so further into the lawn to get a clean edge, we needed to add more rock. We had a yard and a half delivered by a local company who charged us $25 for the rock and $60 for delivery. While I raised my eyebrows at the charge, they explained that their dump truck only gets four to five miles to the gallon and that gas prices have been killing them.

We also bought two evergreens and four of the lighter colored bushes you see above. I've been watering them faithfully, although the rainy weather we've had hasn't made it too difficult to keep them moist.

Ashley took charge of planting annuals around in the pots around the house. Again, the rainy weather has made keeping them alive a breeze. Come the dog days of July and August, it could be a different story.

Getting to Iowa

2008-06-13T05:34:00.004-05:00

We're scheduled to leave for one of our Iowa visits this coming Thursday evening. The DOT is showing multiple closings throughout the eastern half of the state and with yesterday's rain one can only expect more roads to become impassable as the water rises. Hopefully there are no major storms in the coming days and the state receives a respite from the awful weather its been receiving.

The Des Moines Register is reporting that Interstate 80 will close today and remain closed for two to three days. As the most traveled road in the state, the closure is sure to have a huge impact. As one of the commenters on the story put it, "That's big."

ADDED: John Carlson examines the tremendous scale of flooding:

The Coralville dam is releasing 20,000 cubic feet of water per second into the Iowa River. It’s heading through the heart of Iowa City and points south. The Cedar Rapids Gazette quoted an expert of some sort who said that at that rate, the water would fill an enclosed Kinnick Stadium in 16 minutes and 42 seconds.

Ponder that when you think about the fact that around 40,000 cubic feet of water a second is coming down the Des Moines River from the Saylorville dam into Des Moines. That presumably would fill the Hawkeye stadium in 8 minutes and 21 seconds.

Another expert — there are a lot of experts around these days — said the comparatively small Cedar River is now flowing at a volume equal to the Mississippi River when the Mississippi is at flood stage.

Gives some perspective, doesn’t it?

Scenes from a Garage Sale

2008-06-12T15:41:00.003-05:00

Preparation for the rummage sale we're hosting tomorrow and Saturday is well underway. If anything catches your eye, let me know and I'll pull it from the showroom floor. Otherwise, the garage door opens to the public tomorrow morning at eight.

Tiger vs. Phil (I hear there are a few others playing this weekend too)

2008-06-11T20:18:00.003-05:00

Tomorrow the U.S. Open tees off at Torrey Pines outside San Diego, California. In a mouthwatering pairing, Tiger and Phil will be playing with each other for the first two days of the tournament. Time will tell if they'll be playing together when it counts over the weekend.

Rick Reilly, who has returned from a brief hiatus from column writing now with ESPN Magazine, takes a look at Tiger vs. Phil. While his pro-Mickelson hyperbole seems a bit strong to me, there's definitely a lot of truth included. Phil makes decisions during the heat of the battle that make you shake your head.

Sports Illustrated in the meantime, now without a regular writer for its last page column, imagines a world where Tiger never existed a la George Bailey and It's a Wonderful Life. Fuzzy takes one on the chin again.

DirecTV has announced that it will offer an interactive mix of four dedicated channels to the tournament similar to what it did for the Masters which makes me even more excited for the opening rounds. Word is, Tiger and Phil will have an entire channel dedicated to their round so it will be possible to follow them from start to finish without missing a stroke. I have to believe that ESPN will have a hard time cutting away from them, however, so my guess is that the national feed will cover virtually all of their shots as well. Looking at the success both players have had at Torrey Pines in the past (Tiger six wins; Phil three) it seems likely at least one will be near the top of the leaderboard come Sunday. Time will tell. My prediction is that neither of them will come out on top. I like the way Kenny Perry has been playing. He's my pick. Watch out for Anthony Kim and K.J. Choi as well - two players who have the type of game to succeed in the nation's championship.

July 11

2008-06-10T11:30:00.000-05:00

Apple announced yesterday that the follow-up to the iPhone will be released in July. Major upgrades include real-time GPS, expanded battery life, and faster browsing on AT&T's 3G network. The best part about yesterday's announcement was the shift in pricing to a more affordable $199 for the 8 GB and $299 for the 16 GB.

To see Steve Jobs, the mastermind behind Apple, presenting the iPhone yesterday to software developers and reporters, click here. The whole thing lasts over ninety minutes, but scrolling ahead to the 1:22:00 mark will get you to the good stuff.

Lost...

2008-06-09T06:45:00.001-05:00

...and found. Great story.

Tiger is Back; Stricker Auditions for the Rockettes

2008-06-09T06:08:00.004-05:00

With the U.S. Open starting this week, many eyes will be turning to Tiger to see if he'll be able to rebound from the arthroscopic knee surgery he underwent on April 15. He played a practice round yesterday at Torrey Pines and was trailed by a couple camera crews and reporters. A highlight from the round:

While Tiger was putting on the green, he was spotted by Steve Stricker, who was teeing off on the 18th. Stricker waved and made a kicking motion with his left leg — think a pale impression of a Rockette — and hollered: “How is it? How’s the knee?”
“I can keep up with you,” Woods yelled, smiling.
“What are you doing here so early?” Stricker asked.
“You know me — sleeping in,” joked Woods, who is known for usual zero-dark-thirty practice rounds.

"He actually bloodied my ear"

2008-06-08T14:44:00.002-05:00

Bob Anderson, best known for playing the adolescent version of George Bailey in It's a Wonderful Life, passed away at age 75. In one of the most memorable scenes from the film, the young Bailey points out an error made by Old Man Gower who has been drinking heavily because of the death of his son. In an obituary at CNN.com, it's pointed out that H.B. Warner, playing the role of the soused Gower, was quite the method actor:

Warner took the role seriously and on the day of shooting had been drinking and was "pretty ripe," Victoria Anderson said. The scene called for Warner's character to slap the boy. Anderson told the Los Angeles Times in 1996 that the scene and its rehearsals were painful. "He actually bloodied my ear," Anderson told the paper. "My ear was beat up and my face was red, and I was in tears." "At the end when it was all over, he (Warner) was very lovable. He grabbed me and hugged me, and he meant it," Anderson said.

If you've never seen the film, here's the abridged version which includes the scene described above:

Magic 8-Ball as Part of Evolution

2008-06-04T05:12:00.000-05:00

I'm no neural scientist, but Mark Changizi of Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute in New York seems to have made a discovery that amazes me: Humans can predict the future:

When light hits your retina, about one-tenth of a second goes by before the brain translates the signal into a visual perception of the world. Scientists already knew about the lag, yet they have debated over exactly how we compensate, with one school of thought proposing our motor system somehow modifies our movements to offset the delay. Changizi now says it's our visual system that has evolved to compensate for neural delays, generating images of what will occur one-tenth of a second into the future. That foresight keeps our view of the world in the present. It gives you enough heads up to catch a fly ball (instead of getting socked in the face) and maneuver smoothly through a crowd. His research on this topic is detailed in the May/June issue of the journal Cognitive Science.

What first comes to my mind is that moment that occurs during a car crash in which you not only have that split second to slam on the breaks, but your brain also takes that mental snapshot that embeds itself in your brain. For me, that snapshot is of two deer in front of my old PT Crusier.

More Footage from Parkersburg

2008-06-03T22:19:00.003-05:00

Tonight, the Des Moines Register posted more raw footage taken from surveillance cameras at Parkersburg's First State Bank. This time, it's of a home being destroyed in the path of the tornado:

Don't Mess with the Pack...

2008-06-03T20:20:00.002-05:00

...even in the off-season. Way to go, Noah, although unscrewing a bedpost seems a little too time-consuming when someone's breaking into your home. My weapon of choice would be my Tommy Armour 845 nine-iron.

Correction: GPS Self-Portrait a Fraud

2008-06-03T19:17:00.002-05:00

Remember the GPS self-portrait/DHL advertisement I posted about a while back? It's been uncovered as a fake.

How quickly stunts like this go from fact to fiction in the age of the blogosphere:

Since releasing the drawing and details of his project earlier this month, bloggers were quick to accuse him of pushing a hoax. Many pointed out that DHL delivery planes would have been highly unlikely to make the tight loops in the North Atlantic that form the hair of the self-portrait. Others noted that many of the package's mid-route stops appear to be in the middle of the ocean. "[He] could have at least centered the drawing over the land areas, so it would be more believable that DHL had made stops there, as opposed to a DHL plane making loop-the-loops out over the Atlantic," a reader called Shinanigans posted on the Neatorama blog. "Were the DHL pilots on acid?" another asked.

Sweet Deal

2008-06-03T19:03:00.003-05:00

We bought an iMac computer this fall and have been loving it. I've been extolling the virtues of Mac over PC to anyone who will listen and when our laptop becomes outdated we'll definitely replace our Dell with an Apple. Given this new deal, available to both educators and students, when you buy a new Mac you will also receive a new iPod Touch. If you're thinking about getting aboard the Mac train, now's a great time!

Experience

2008-06-03T18:04:00.002-05:00

With Obama looking more and more likely to clinch the Democratic nomination tonight, it looks likely that Clinton will concede at some point in the near future. I'm guessing that this video will still seem useful to some even though Hillary is finished. There's been all sorts of talk about her as the VP, but I think Obama would need to be crazy to offer her the position. If he were to win, can you imagine what it would be like to have to serve in the office of President with Bill and Hillary looking over your shoulder at every turn?

"Despite the fact that it sounds about as enjoyable as gargling with magma, it is one of the fastest-growing sports in the world."

2008-06-03T06:17:00.002-05:00

A look at the burgeoning sport of tower running.

Parkersburg Tornado

2008-06-03T05:45:00.002-05:00

The AP has released surveillance footage from inside Parkersburg, Iowa's First State Bank at the moment the storm hit. Keep your eye on the window. The video provides a convincing argument for staying away from windows when a powerful storm is moving through.

The Power of Lightning

2008-06-02T20:30:00.004-05:00

The results of a bolt that struck late last Thursday night across the street from my parents' home:

This view provides some perspective with regard to the height of pines that have been a fixture on Whitehall's Main Street for what must be nearing a hundred years or more:

I'm pretty sure that only one of the giant pines is left after the strike. Five or six years ago there were some impressive straight line winds that took one down in another display of Mother Nature's frightening power. I use the word "frightening" because I was home at the time and I'm not ashamed to say may heart rate tripled when I heard the tree snap off and come cascading into our front yard.

And since we're on the subject, here's the best song about lightning I know of:

I Ain't Scared of Lightning - Tom McRae

I ain't scared of lightning
Come on and do your worst
If they gave degrees
For cheating destiny
Then man
I got a first

No I ain't scared of lightning
It's the same old empty threat
I've been standing proud
Beneath the gathering cloud
And man
I ain't dead yet
No I ain't scared of lightning
And thunder never killed
I was born in a summer storm
I live there still
Yeah I was born in a summer storm
I live there still

"It’s Iowa, so it’s not very exciting.”

2008-05-31T17:54:00.002-05:00

A front page piece in the NY Times today takes a look at the exodus of college students from the state of Iowa and the result it's having on the job market in Des Moines. Unlike most of the country where there seems to be an economic downturn, the outlook in the Hawkeye state is much rosier:

As rising unemployment and layoffs beset workers around the country, Iowa faces a different problem: a surplus of jobs. Or to put it another way: a shortage of workers. A survey of companies by Iowa Workforce Development, a state agency, found as many as 48,000 job vacancies, in industries including financial services — Des Moines trails only Hartford as the nation’s insurance capital — health care and skilled manufacturing. One estimate projects the job surplus to reach 198,000 by 2014, with vacancies increasingly in professional positions. Greater Des Moines alone faces a shortfall of 60,000 workers in the next decade.

The article also examines the reasons why such a surplus of jobs has been created:

Companies want to be in Iowa because wages are lower than elsewhere in the nation or region, except South Dakota. But low wages also drive young college graduates out of the state, especially as student debt loads have risen, and they discourage workers from other states from moving to Iowa. Some, like Mr. Tew, accept relatively low wages in exchange for Iowa’s low cost of living. Companies compete on amenities and benefits more than salary, said Craig Jackman, president of Paragon IT Professionals, a recruiter and consultant firm.

Looking back at our position after graduation from college, it made a whole lot of sense for us to be in Wisconsin for the very reason described above. While salaries were certainly not the main reason in our choice to come to Wisconsin, I'd be untruthful if I said it didn't come up in our conversations about where we wanted to work after college.

And for the record, I don't buy the argument that Iowa is a boring state. It's a great place with a vibrant cultural scene. You could go to any state in the nation and find thousands of kids more than willing to rip on their city or state as boring.

Cory Chisel and the Wandering Sons

2008-05-31T10:44:00.003-05:00

Last night, Ashley and I went to the Fox Cities Performing Arts Center for the first time. We've been meaning to get to a show there for quite some time, but were never compelled to go. It's an impressive hall and is a great venue for seeing a show, or as we saw last night, a concert.

Cory Chisel and the Wandering Sons - a local band that's ready to make a major breakthrough onto the national scene - is playing a couple final shows in the area before beginning a national tour in support of their new album that's scheduled for nationwide release sometime in June. The band has signed with RCA Records which is pretty cool for a group that's been playing small clubs throughout the Fox Valley over that past few years. We saw them play at a small club in town about three years ago and commented at the time that they had a quality that set them apart from the average local band. They've continued their ascent and I was even more impressed with their level of songwriting and performance after seeing them last night.

Their set alternated between full-band songs and stripped-down acoustic numbers. While the backing band complete with banjo, piano, electric guitar, clarinet, and even accordion was enjoyable, Chisel and singer Adriel Harris created some transcendent moments during the acoustic portion of the set. Here's a sampling:

The Post-Crescent also has some in-depth coverage taking a look at the band's progress and recording work over during the recent months.

Battling Through "Numnah" to Win the Title

2008-05-31T10:32:00.003-05:00

Did you catch the finals of the National Spelling Bee last night on ABC? Here's the moment that this year's bee will remembered for - at least on YouTube:

He would go on to win by correctly spelling the word "guerdon" in sixteenth round.

Airplane Crash in Honduras

2008-05-30T17:07:00.003-05:00

When Ashley and I traveled to Honduras in 2005 to visit a friend who was volunteering in the Peace Corps at the time, we flew into Toncontin Airport in Tegucigalpa - the capital city. At the time, here's how I described it:

We flew into Tegucigalpa, the capital, on Sunday night last week and my first feeling was one of relief. The approach was easily the most hair-raising I've experienced and I'm glad I hadn't read this article explaining how tricky the landing can be for pilots. Instead of a traditional landing, the plane corkscrews through the mountains surrounding Tegucigalpa until finally squeezing through a ravine before hitting the runway. Unless you’re a thrill seeker who is traveling to Honduras, I recommend flying into the country’s second largest city, San Pedro Sula.

In the wake of today's tragedy there, it makes me feel even stronger about my final sentence. YouTube, which Drudge is linking to, has a ton of videos of what it's like to land there. Reading the people's comments following the videos definitely provides a vivid description from many people who've flown into the airport.

World's Largest Drawing

2008-05-26T11:06:00.000-05:00

This is cool:

"I do have a tendency to kind of fixate on what goes on at 17 after having lived through a near-death experience there."

2008-05-08T20:23:00.000-05:00

Jason Sobel has an interesting piece revisiting a Golf Digest contest to determine "America's Worst Avid Golfer." The winner, or loser, depending on how you look at it, made a 66 on the famous island green at the TPC Sawgrass seventeenth. If you're thinking you could get a 66 with your putter, you're on the right track - it's exactly what was needed to conquer one of the most daunting holes in golf. The piece is well worth the read - especially if you plan on watching the Player's Championship this weekend.

This summer, Golf Digest is sponsering a similar contest where they test Tiger Woods' theory that a 10-handicapper "wouldn't break 100" on a U.S. layout. NBC will broadcast a (mercifully) shortened version of the contest where they put Tiger's theory to the test. I'm betting at least one of the participants goes sub-100.

J.D.

2008-05-08T19:58:00.000-05:00

One of the most popular videos on YouTube this week features a bare-chested, barefoot John Daly being interviewed by a local news affiliate while playing his course in Branson, Missouri. Although a shirtless Daly is not a pretty sight, I'm somewhat surprised by the outcry the clip has received. Here it is, if you haven't seen it:

Who hasn't played golf with their shirt off on a hot day? And shoeless? The legendary Sam Snead is revered for having golfed barefoot when he was a youngster learning the game. Now Daly is being chastised, albeit indirectly, through a player's meeting by tour commissioner Tim Finchem.

Finchem declined to say whether he has spoken to Daly, but he made his expectations quite clear Tuesday. "There are certain things about presentation that we must insist on," Finchem said. "There are certain things about presentation that are not going to be tolerated. I think that the world changes and you make adjustments, but I think perhaps we need to be more direct in our comments to players about specific do's and don'ts, and increase focus in that area to make sure that we have a level of professionalism going forward that we're comfortable with." It was the latest incident with Daly that some found offensive.

Don't get wrong. Golf is and always has been a gentleman's game. That said, people need to distinguish between Sunday afternoon at the Masters and Tuesday morning at John Daly's Murder Rock Golf and Country Club. The course bears his name for pete's sake! It's not that different from golfing in his own backyard. More than anything, I think this clip contributes to one's understanding of why Daly is one of the most popular players on tour. Watching the goofy local reporter play with Daly makes you believe you yourself could go eighteen holes with him. And not only that, but have a great time doing it. We'll be in Branson this summer spending some time with family. While we've played a great course in Branson during previous visits, I wouldn't mind getting in eighteen at Murder Rock.

Today, Daly is in Milan, Italy playing in the Italian Open. He held the lead at points during his opening round and finished with a 67. He kept his shirt on for all eighteen holes.

Making the Grade #11: Twin Peaks

2008-05-07T19:50:00.004-05:00

Hopefully you've had a chance to catch up on past episodes of Making the Grade because we're back with a fresh installment looking at season one of David Lynch's classic television show Twin Peaks. While it may be a bit premature to call a show that's less than twenty years old a classic, I'm confident it will stand the test of time. It wouldn't even surprise me if they tried to revive the series given the ceaseless dreck the networks continue to churn out. While the series certainly doesn't cater to audiences that feast on the mindlessness of reality television, it's the kind of show that is always welcome on the airwaves. With its strong acting, great writing, and never-ending sense of mystery and intrigue, Twin Peaks draws you into a TV landscape you won't forget.

As promised in the episode, here's the bizarre, frightening, entertaining, surreal, and ultimately humorous dream sequence from the show's second episode:

New Home for Central College Education Department

2008-05-07T19:28:00.008-05:00

Over the summer, Ashley and I went back to Central College for the first time since we graduated to take a stroll around the grounds and to catch up with a few professors. In talking with a professor who had taught us both his Foundations of Education class, he was quick to pull out some fresh designs of the new building that would be home to Central's education department. As alumni of the program, we were more than happy to make a contribution to the project when Central called this fall asking for donations. According to the official site for the project, they only have 5.8 million dollars left to raise.

If you're interested in following the progress of the construction, you'll be able to access a live image of the building site by looking here. As of the writing of this post, here's the progress thus far:

While it's literally a hole in the ground at this point, here is how it will look upon completion:

Ashley and I had a wonderful experience in the education program at Central, but I envy the students of the future who will be able to experience learning in a state-of-the-art facility. Go Dutch!

Looking for Work as an Extra? Come to Wisconsin

2008-05-06T21:24:00.004-05:00

Off the heals of Johnny Depp and the new movie Public Enemies that has been filming throughout the state, the AP reports that the Coen Brothers are considering Wisconsin as the backdrop for their next work:

Fresh off their Oscar wins for No Country for Old Men, the film-making brothers Joel and Ethan Coen are scouting Milwaukee suburbs for a movie to come out in 2009, said Scott Robbe, director of the Film Wisconsin office. Minnesota Film and TV Board director Lucinda Winter announced in September that the movie would shoot in Minnesota, the filmmakers’ home state. But Winter later warned that unless the Legislature approved a $500,000 incentive, the Coens could look elsewhere. Wisconsin may be where they land.The film’s producer, Bob Graf, has requested photos and other information from the Film Wisconsin office about possible locations in north Milwaukee suburbs, Robbe said.

How to Win Two Million in 15 Minutes

2008-05-06T21:19:00.002-05:00

It doesn't even take a million dollars in start-up funds.

Jeopardy in Wisconsin

2008-05-05T21:07:00.003-05:00

This evening the Jeopardy College Championship kicked off with shows taped at the Kohl Center. The DVR is set and we're looking forward to following the tournament for the next couple of weeks. Jeopardy has put quite a bit of work into their site to promote the shows. Although they were filmed a few weeks ago and the contestants know whether they've won or lost, each one is still posting blogs as if the tournament is happening right now. Seems somewhat artificial. I wonder if they had the contestants write the blogs while they were in Madison and then just saved their entries? Or are they writing them now as if they're really competing over the coming weeks?

Could This Prediction Have Turned Out Any Worse for Hillary?

2008-05-04T10:17:00.002-05:00

From ABC News prior to the Kentucky Derby:

Sen. Hillary Clinton, D-N.Y., told a crowd of supporters Thursday that she is pulling for the filly, Eight Bells, for the upcoming Kentucky Derby. In selecting Eight Bells, Clinton picked the only girl horse in the race. Perhaps the most fitting move for the woman vying to be the nation's first woman elected president. Sen. Clinton repeated her desire for the filly to be victorious – saying to a crowd in Jeffersonville, Indiana saying she was sending in her daughter to place her bets. "I hope that everybody will go to the derby on Saturday and place just a little money on the filly for me. I won't be able to be there this year – my daughter is going to be there and so she has strict instructions to bet on Eight Bells."

As you've probably heard, the horse had to be euthanized after the race because she broke both front ankles.

Cesc Fabregas is En Fuego

2008-05-04T09:37:00.002-05:00

Arsenal, my favorite team in the Premier League, hasn't quite lived up to this season's hopes at the start of the campaign. Nonetheless, the team is full of young guns who show promise for the future. At the forefront of this group of phenoms is Spaniard Cesc Fabregas. Check out this cool new Nike commercial he stars in:

The commercial is a promoting a show that's scheduled to air on UK television. I'm not really sure what the "Cesc Fabregas Show" will be about, but it's clear Nike is looking at it as a great marketing opportunity.

Look for many of these spots will appear on U.S. television this summer when ESPN and ABC show Euro 2008 - a tournament that Spain and Fabregas look to win.

The 25 Hour Sermon

2008-05-03T08:22:00.003-05:00

Ever get the feeling your pastor's sermons are good, but just need to be a little longer? If so, get to Tomah, Wisconsin for tomorrow's service:

Pastor Terry L. Terrell is about to give the longest sermon of his life. The 63-year-old Tomah minister will begin preaching for 25 straight hours on Sunday morning - taking only a five-minute break each hour - to raise money for persecuted, impoverished people in Sudan's Darfur region.

Hopefully he's able to raise both money and awareness for the cause. That said, I wonder how long parishioners will stay. Will some feel obligated to sit through the entire sermon? Imagine if some unsuspecting visitors show up with no idea that the sermon is intended to last a full day. At what point do they get up and leave?

Tulip Time

2008-05-03T08:05:00.000-05:00

Throughout my years at Central College, there was no surer sign of spring than the blossoming tulips and the annual Tulip Time Festival. The Des Moines Register reports:

It sounds like the unseasonable spring temperatures haven't had a negative effect on the Tulips themselves. I remember at least two of the festivals where they became "Stem Fests" because of mistimed blossoming.

Perhaps He Could Be Closer for the Brewers

2008-04-22T20:43:00.000-05:00

After Gagne blew another save today, I think the Brewers need to start thinking about who they can get to close out games. I nominate the fellow mentioned in this story. Not only does he have great control, but he also has a sound political mind.

Florida 911

2008-04-22T20:30:00.000-05:00

Remember the show Rescue 911 hosted by William Shattner? It was one of my favorite shows when I was in the fourth grade even though it gave me nightmares. The reenactments were always the most entertaining, yet frightening part.

I'd love to see the reenactment of this 911 call. Is it just me, or is there a hint of condescension in the operator's voice - almost like she wants to say, "As if!"

Actually, there's also been video added. I guess there's no need to bring back Shattner.

Making the Grade #10: Apocalypto

2008-04-20T22:36:00.000-05:00

A look at Mel Gibson's thriller about the end of the Mayan civilization. Although archeologists and anthropologists had some problems with the film, we were entertained throughout. Having visited Mayan ruins a couple summers ago, it was somewhat eerie to think about what may have transpired there a thousand years earlier.

What's Next for the Funniest Man Alive?

2008-04-20T18:00:00.000-05:00

Ricky Gervais talks to the Guardian today and shares what he has in the pipeline. First, there's a film:

Now he's directing a film for the first time, This Side of the Truth. 'It's set in a world rather like this one, but there's no gene for lying. Except for me. My character. I can suddenly lie. So I do. A lot.' There will be, I assume, redemption? 'Maybe not quite that but with all the cynicism, everything I've done, I think there always turns out to be ... a certain forgiveness.

Second, there's a television show he's creating with Stephen Merchant - the same tandem that was responsible for Extras and The Office:

The working title is The Men from the Pru. It's about a group of twentysomethings working in an insurance company in the early Seventies. In Reading. This is where Gervais was born, in 1961. 'It's a period piece for a couple of reasons,' he says. 'We wanted to show, for instance, that the sexual revolution was only really going on in Carnaby Street. Not Swindon. Not Reading. It is, essentially, about blue-collar people getting white-collar jobs.' And it is about people who would live and die in one town. 'Which was one of the big differences between then and now,' he says.

Poetry Reading

2008-04-20T15:27:00.000-05:00

Yesterday I wrote about Billy Collins and his poem, "The Lanyard." Browsing YouTube today, I came across a video of him presenting it and two other poems in Aspen. It's a little slow to load on my computer, but it's well worth the wait.

Ten Grand

2008-04-20T15:01:00.000-05:00

I noticed a mini-milestone occurred yesterday: Portsider received visit 10,000. I try to keep in mind that I write the blog for myself, but it's easy to get caught up watching traffic through the site more than I should.

So who was the lucky number 10,000? Someone from Redwood City, California. Don't ask me who. I only know a few people in California and they're nowhere near Redwood City.

Maybe there should be a prize offered to visiter number 20,000. Considering how long it took to reach 10,000, (I started the blog in January of 2005) I have a little while to think about it.

Billy Collins

2008-04-19T18:26:00.000-05:00

This year, Appleton and the surrounding communities are hosting the first annual Fox Cities Book Festival. Many nationally-known writers are in town sharing their work and the best part is that almost all events are free.

On Thursday night, Ashley and I went to see Billy Collins, former National Poet Laureate, at the Lawrence Chapel. Collins is known for poetry that is both accessible and humorous. He didn't disappoint.

His reading reminded me somewhat of a rock concert in that the list of poems he read seemed strategically laid out to keep the audience rapt throughout his hour-long presentation. Likewise, his witty banter between poems gave the impression that he could even moonlight as a stand-up comedian. Collins told stories that lead to the writing of poems and talked about the work that goes into being a poet and English professor. Listening to him talk between poems provided the audience with the feeling of being a student in one of his collegiate classes and if Thursday night is an accurate portrayal of his classroom demeanor, sign me up.

His lineup of poems built to a crescendo and when nearing the end of his reading he said he'd be reading the poem "The Lanyard," there was widespread applause from the audience. I've been to my fair share of poetry readings, but Thursday night was the first time I've ever seen an audience cheer before the poem is read. Collins reacted saying, "Maybe I don't need to read it since you know it already." Though Ashley and I weren't familiar with the poem, we agreed it was the highlight of the evening:

"The Lanyard"

The other day as I was ricocheting slowly
off the pale blue walls of this room,
bouncing from typewriter to piano,
from bookshelf to an envelope lying on the floor,
I found myself in the L section of the dictionary
where my eyes fell upon the word lanyard.

No cookie nibbled by a French novelist
could send one more suddenly into the past --
a past where I sat at a workbench at a camp
by a deep Adirondack lake
learning how to braid thin plastic strips
into a lanyard, a gift for my mother.

I had never seen anyone use a lanyard
or wear one, if that’s what you did with them,
but that did not keep me from crossing
strand over strand again and again
until I had made a boxy
red and white lanyard for my mother.

She gave me life and milk from her breasts,
and I gave her a lanyard.
She nursed me in many a sickroom,
lifted teaspoons of medicine to my lips,
set cold face-cloths on my forehead,
and then led me out into the airy light

and taught me to walk and swim,
and I, in turn, presented her with a lanyard.
Here are thousands of meals, she said,
and here is clothing and a good education.
And here is your lanyard, I replied,
which I made with a little help from a counselor.

Here is a breathing body and a beating heart,
strong legs, bones and teeth,
and two clear eyes to read the world, she whispered,
and here, I said, is the lanyard I made at camp.
And here, I wish to say to her now,
is a smaller gift--not the archaic truth

that you can never repay your mother,
but the rueful admission that when she took
the two-tone lanyard from my hands,
I was as sure as a boy could be
that this useless, worthless thing I wove
out of boredom would be enough to make us even.

For my mom it wasn't lanyards, but rather various types of plants grown in milk cartons. What was it that you remember making and giving to your mother?

After the reading, Collins signed copies of his books. In reading Sailing Alone Around the Room, the book I purchased and had signed, I've come across a poem that I may like even more than "The Lanyard." Read it here.

Fore!

2008-04-19T17:22:00.000-05:00

One of the surest signs that spring is here to stay is the opening round of golf. My dad and I played Reid Golf Course and while my game wasn't great, it wasn't bad either. For the first time out on the year, you can't ask for much more - room for improvement, but strong enough to make you want to get out again soon.

5.4

2008-04-18T09:30:00.000-05:00

Did you feel the earthquake this morning? I slept straight through it, as I'm sure most people did, but on the local news this morning people as far north as Peshtigo, Wisconsin were calling in to say that they had experienced about ten seconds of shaking and rattling. Another fellow from Menasha, which is only a couple miles away, also seemed pretty convinced he'd felt the tremors.

Blogger Althouse in Madison says it was definitely a quake and is surprised that two dozen of her neighbors called 911 between 4:50 and 5:00 am.

Making the Grade #9: Ticket to Ride

2008-04-16T19:12:00.000-05:00

We're taking a different track with our latest podcast: A board game review. Click the play button in the GCast player on the right. Recommended to us by friends, this is the game that is at the top of our "must play" list at the moment.

Remember: Past episodes can be accessed by clicking the "posts" button

Most Intelligent City in the US?

2008-04-16T18:44:00.000-05:00

A new study claims it's right here in Wisconsin.

Project Genesis

2008-04-16T18:28:00.000-05:00

I could handle a couple of weeks on this cruise liner, the world's largest, from Royal Caribbean.

Hopefully they use the best rivets available.

"Mission: Exceeded"

2008-04-16T07:56:00.000-05:00

The state of Iowa reacts to the departure of Drake's head coach, Keno Davis. Sean Keeler says:

Thanks for turning a sow's ear of a program into a silk purse. Thanks for dressing Cinderella in blue and sending her back to the Big Dance. Thanks for making the Bulldogs relevant again. Thanks for turning "Mission: Impossible" into "Mission: Accomplished."

I must admit I jumped onto the Drake bandwagon mid-season. It's too bad they couldn't have advanced further in the NCAA Tournament and had their season ended by a miracle shot from Western Kentucky.

Packers 2008

2008-04-15T18:50:00.000-05:00

The full regular season schedule was released this afternoon. Based my predictions over the weekend, I'm feeling confident enough to make another: The Pack will go 8-8. The playoffs? Doubtful.

When Cancer is Cured...

2008-04-15T18:25:00.000-05:00

...do we need to include an asterisk?

In the wake of steroid and HGH use allegations throughout baseball and blood doping in sports like cycling and track, a new survey published by Nature suggests that "brain doping" is common among scientists.

I can't help but compare the competitive nature of athletics to the same desire to get ahead in the scientific field. In reading publications such as the Mitchell Report, it seems that athletes who were getting passed up by those using performance enhancing drugs sometimes turned to the drugs themselves so they could maintain their competitive edge. It's within the realm of possibility that the same situation exists within upper echelons of academia and science. If breakthroughs in medicine, science, and technology are aided through the use of drugs like Ritalin and Provigil, does it make the breakthroughs any less beneficial?

Iceberg? No...

2008-04-15T07:34:00.000-05:00

It's all about the rivets new research finds. Cutting corners will ultimately catch up with you.

Pressure Cooker

2008-04-14T07:46:00.000-05:00

While Sunday at the Masters never quite had the feel of a real horse race, the heat was on. Of the four non-major winners in front of Tiger going into the final round, their scores were 79, 78, 77, and a 75 from the champion, Immelman. The clip of Snedeker above shows how difficult it is to keep one's game (and composure) together for four days straight. Though Immelman had a chance to break the streak yesterday, there still has never been a Masters competitor has shot all four rounds in the sixties.

Last Olympics?

2008-04-13T17:45:00.000-05:00

Protests during the torch relay. Boycotts of the opening ceremonies. It's just the beginning of the story that will continue throughout the summer in the lead up to the 2008 Olympic Games in Beijing. Buzz Bissinger, author of Friday Night Lights, makes the argument that there's only one solution: The Olympics should be ended. Permanently.

His piece takes an incredibly negative view of the games and fails to mention the many positive outcomes that result from a city and nation hosting the Olympics. Do I think nations could ever simply forget the games completely? It's possible, but unlikely. The main reason: Money. Bissinger does, however, provide a convincing outlook on how the United States alone could bring down the Olympics:

A permanent end to the Olympics might actually not be that difficult. All it would really take is a single act of courage and morality by the United States to pull out of the Games forever on the basis that the mission is not coming close to being served. An American departure would severely dilute the Games since it would no longer be a world competition of anything.
But a far stronger factor in the exit of the American team would be the likelihood that American corporations would stop backing the Olympics with their megamillions. It would also severely diminish the willingness of American networks to continue to pay mind-boggling sums for the broadcast rights to the Olympics, which in the case of NBC was about $2.2 billion for the Games in 2010 and 2012. If Americans aren’t playing, Americans won’t watch.

Reversing the Curse

2008-04-13T16:02:00.000-05:00

I don't like Red Sox or the Yankees, so from a neutral standpoint this story is quite enjoyable. My favorite part is the quote from George Steinbrenner's son, Hal. It will be interesting to see if the Yankees go after the guy responsible and if so, for how much money.

Making the Grade #8: The Apartment

2008-04-13T14:00:00.000-05:00

A review of The Apartment - the Best Picture Award winner in 1960 - is now streaming in GCast player. Look for the next episode Wednesday night.

Correction: In the podcast I incorrectly state that Fred MacMurray played the father on Donna Reed. He actually played the father on the series My Three Sons.

Badgers for a Thousand, Alex

2008-04-13T10:59:00.000-05:00

About two months ago, I received an email from Jeopardy letting me know that the College Championship was scheduled to be filmed on location at the University of Wisconsin's Kohl Center. The message also provided instructions for getting tickets to the tapings of the show. Being fans of quiz shows and Jeopardy in particular, Ashley and I sent in our self-addressed stamped envelope hoping to get access to last night's filming in Madison.

Unfortunately, all we got back in our envelope was a letter informing us that demand for tickets far exceeded the space available. They also threw in a crummy postcard of Alex Trebek in a Wisconsin sweatshirt. It was actually kind of cool in a phony sort of way, but I was disappointed we were denied tickets.

From the article in today's Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel, it sounds like we missed out on a fun time. In picking the contestants, they definitely covered their bases with the hometown crowd by selecting participants from both the UW and Marquette.

The shows air May 5 to 16. My DVR will be set.

Sunday at Augusta

2008-04-13T09:40:00.000-05:00

Is Tiger out of the running with eighteen holes left to play at the Masters? Gene Wojciechowski at ESPN doesn't think so. While I'm looking forward to seeing if Tiger can charge up the leaderboard today, my gut says the winner will come from the quartet of Trevor Immelman, Brandt Snedeker, Paul Casey, and Steve Flesch. All four are seeking their first major win.

If I had to bet on one, I'd lean toward Immelman. And not just because he's two strokes clear of the field and six ahead of Tiger. He's got a great swing that's obviously in the groove (Gary Player said his swing reminded him of Ben Hogan) and a hot putter. The putter, in the end, will be the reason why Tiger is unable to make enough of a move to be wearing green tonight.

Lucky to be Right-Handed

2008-04-13T09:13:00.000-05:00

Best Channel Ever?

2008-04-12T16:07:00.000-05:00

With The Masters set to tee off in a few minutes, I think this year's broadcast is better than ever. The Masters Mix, an exclusive channel being offered by DirecTV, is showing live action on three screens and a highlights feed on a fourth screen. As you can see from the shot above, the mix channel also provides real-time scoring updates from around the course. While viewing, you are given the capability to switch audio to all four of the screens. If you want to go full-screen on a specific feed, you simply hit enter. All four dedicated channels are in high-definition. If there's a better way to show off the capabilities of HD TV than Augusta National, let me know, because I haven't seen it yet.

A Good Move

2008-04-12T15:22:00.000-05:00

When you watch as much sports on television as I do, you become accustomed to the key characteristics that make up a great commentator. When I use the word "great," names like Jim Nance, Vin Scully, and Wisconsin's very own Matt LePay come to mind.

In comparison, NFL Network's Bryant Gumbel was out of his league. In reading today's article on his departure, it seems as if he knew his presence wasn't suited to the play-by-play booth. Though the NFL only broadcasts a handful of games a year, most of which go unwatched because of the ridiculous stance of cable companies, I'll look forward to hearing a new voice for the network.

Making the Grade #7: I Am Legend

2008-04-11T17:55:00.000-05:00

We've been away for awhile on spring break, but we're back with a fresh episode looking at I Am Legend, an apocalyptic thriller starring Will Smith taking on flesh-eating zombies in Manhattan.

We hope to be back on our regular schedule of reviewing from here on out.

Click Play in the GCast player on the right to listen to the most recent episode, or double click Posts to go back to past episodes.

Making the Grade #6: Mad Men

2008-03-19T23:26:00.000-05:00

Today's episode of Making the Grade takes a look at Madison Avenue during the early sixties through the eyes of the critically acclaimed series on AMC, Mad Men. All you need to do is press the play arrow in the green player to the right to listen.

The clip below features Peggy, the new secretary, being introduced to the office during the first episode.

Note the "overwhelming technology" that is made "simple enough for a woman to use."

Making the Grade #5: Alfred Hitchcock's Rebecca

2008-03-16T18:27:00.000-05:00

The latest episode of Making the Grade, available for your listening pleasure by clicking the play button to the right, focuses on Alfred Hitchcock's Rebecca. The film stars Joan Fontaine and Sir Laurence Olivier and was the recipient of the Best Picture award in 1940.

For those of you wishing to catch up on past episodes, or even if you have a favorite installment that you just can't get enough of, know that by clicking the "Posts" button on the GCast player you can access past podcasts.

R.I.P. July 31, 2004 - March 16, 2008

2008-03-16T11:42:00.000-05:00

The Portsider coffee maker, who provided thousands of wonderful cups of java, died today in the early morning hours. She was less than four years old.

Last week it seemed as though she was on her final legs, but a thorough cleaning infused new life and prospects looked hopeful for a full recovery. Indeed, there were five superb pots of Kona blend coffee made in the final week before this morning's collapse when all attempts at a revival failed.

Though she had been maligned in her early days for being complicated to run and difficult to clean, her final years as a coffee maker earned praise from all who were able to enjoy her offerings. On many occasions, when friends and family were visiting, it was common for three or four pots of coffee to be brewed in one day - a testament to the superb taste and flavor created by one of the most sophisticated coffee makers on the market today.

Perhaps her most memorable feature was the ability to grind whole beans in the instant before making the coffee - an ability that produced a brew with unparalleled freshness and boldness in taste. Those who had the pleasure of waking up to her aromatic delights will certainly feel the sting of this morning's passing most acutely.

The coffee maker was the first owned in the Portsider home and was a wedding present. Because of the vital role she played, plans are in place for an immediate replacement sometime this afternoon. When asked whether there was any regret in replacing her so soon, a source close to the family noted, "We've had a great run together, but I think it just goes to show how important the service she provided was. How many household appliances can you say you use without fail every day of the year? The thought of not having coffee in the Portsider home is unthinkable."

Memorial services will be held this afternoon in the garage. Burial will follow Tuesday morning at roughly 6:30 a.m. when Waste Management services arrive.

In lieu of flowers, the family asks that you raise a mug of your favorite cup of joe in honor of the fine coffee you were sure to enjoy whenever visiting the Portsider home.

The Ides of March Madness

2008-03-15T19:07:00.000-05:00

On this, the middle day of March, I finally feel like the excitement of college basketball during this time of year has arrived. It started last night with a game from the Big Ten Tournament between Indiana and Minnesota. The contest was on the Big Ten Network, so if you missed it, here was the finish:

While last night's shot was great, Blake Hoffarber's buzzer beater last year during his senior year of high school is one of the greatest ever. Teams better start triple-teaming him in the final moments.

The excitement continued today as the Badgers stole one from Michigan State to advance to the finals of the Big Ten Tournament. Hopefully this is just the beginning of some spectacular games during the best time of year for b-ball fans.

Making the Grade #4: The Twilight Series

2008-03-12T21:26:00.000-05:00

Episode #4 of Making the Grade is available for your listening pleasure. In this installment, Ashley discusses Stephenie Meyer's Twilight series of books about vampires run amok in Washington State.

Making the Grade #3: Marty

2008-03-09T21:34:00.000-05:00

Today's review takes a look at the 1956 winner for best picture, Marty. The film stars Ernest Borgnine and a few other tomatoes and dogs.

We'll see you at the Starlight-a Ballroom!

For those of you who are listening to the first few episodes, we'd like to let you know that we're tentatively planning to publish new podcasts on Sundays and Wednesdays. Keep an eye out on those days for fresh and new episodes of Making the Grade.

We welcome any comments or thoughts, so please make your voice heard using the comments function below.

“No one creates a new technology really understanding how it will be used or how it can change a society.”

2008-03-09T18:14:00.000-05:00

A great article in today's NY Times about the effects of cell phones on communication. The title of the post says it all. What I do know for sure is that cell phones are changing the way young people communicate.

Making the Grade #2

2008-03-05T21:20:00.001-06:00

Our second podcast is recorded and streaming for your listening pleasure. Use the comments section below for any thoughts or discussion.

Today's review: Kramer vs. Kramer

Making the Grade

2008-03-02T18:34:00.000-06:00

It's been an eternity since any new material was posted to Portsider, so today is a historic moment in the blog's history. To the right in the sidebar, we've tried making our first ever podcast. We're not really sure about all the publishing details, but we're trying to work it out so our episodes can be downloaded from iTunes. If you click "Get Podcast" in the player, you should be able to subscribe for free through iTunes. Also, it should play straight through the blog.

The New Sunday Routine

2006-06-04T10:10:00.000-05:00

One of the best things about a new house is developing an entirely new routine in life. Here's how Sunday's before church look:

Home Sweet Home

2006-05-18T20:24:00.000-05:00

The wallpaper in the dining room has been stripped and the walls have been taped in preparation for painting.

The foyer, which was completely covered in wallpaper, has been stripped and the walls have been washed. Soon they will be this color.

Scenes from the Move

2006-05-14T19:40:00.000-05:00

In less than twenty-four hours we'll be proud owners of our first home. In the meantime, the boxes for the move have been stacking up around the apartment like blocks in a game of Tetris.

The boxes are all headed here:
The picture above was taken in February. Thankfully, the snow will be gone. If the rain would hold off as well, we'll be all set.

Blizzard of '06

2006-02-16T16:09:00.000-06:00

A few more inches of snow have piled on our balcony since I posted this morning.
The wind is blowing so much, however, that in certain spots you can still see the ground. Our county has a blizzard warning in effect until midnight. Good thing we don't need to go anywhere.

SNOW DAY!

2006-02-16T10:32:00.000-06:00

Looks like virtually every school in the state is closed today. Believe it or not, the table above had no snow on it when we went to bed last night.

'Toons

2006-02-08T19:37:00.000-06:00

Ann Coulter has a biting column up on her site today about the Muhammed cartoons that have caused outrage throughout the Muslim world. Highlights include:

...three cartoons made political points. One showed Muhammad turning away suicide bombers from the gates of heaven, saying "Stop, stop — we ran out of virgins!" — which I believe was a commentary on Muslims' predilection for violence. Another was a cartoon of Muhammad with horns, which I believe was a commentary on Muslims' predilection for violence. The third showed Muhammad with a turban in the shape of a bomb, which I believe was an expression of post-industrial ennui in a secular — oops, no, wait: It was more of a commentary on Muslims' predilection for violence.

In order to express their displeasure with the idea that Muslims are violent, thousands of Muslims around the world engaged in rioting, arson, mob savagery, flag-burning, murder and mayhem, among other peaceful acts of nonviolence.

And this:

The rioting Muslims claim they are upset because Islam prohibits any depictions of Muhammad — though the text is ambiguous on beheadings, suicide bombings and flying planes into skyscrapers.

The belief that Islam forbids portrayals of Muhammad is recently acquired. Back when Muslims created things, rather than blowing them up, they made paintings, frescoes, miniatures and prints of Muhammad.

But apparently the Quran is like the Constitution: It's a "living document," capable of sprouting all-new provisions at will. Muslims ought to start claiming the Quran also prohibits indoor plumbing, to explain their lack of it.

While the crack about indoor fixtures may be a bit below the belt, the column illustrates the complete absurdity of the extremist's conduct.

Speaking of absurdity, Iowahawk, one of my favorite bloggers, also has a new column up today dealing with the cartoon mess. A keen eye for satire, however, leads him to replace Muhammed with a figure who is just as revered - at least in Wisconsin. A must-read.

Portsider's Super Bowl Prediction

2006-02-05T10:37:00.000-06:00

Seattle 31
Pittsburgh 28

Brokeback to the Future

2006-02-04T10:20:00.000-06:00

Ha ha.

Super Bowl Options

2006-02-02T18:07:00.000-06:00

Sirius Satellite Radio, the official home of the NFL on satellite, just came out with their broadcast schedule for Super Bowl XL:

Super Bowl XL Game Schedule on SIRIUS
Westwood One/CBS Radio Sports 4:00 PM 124
Japan's NTV Feed (Japanese) 6:00 PM 107
SMG (Mandarin Chinese) 6:00 PM 110
TV 2 Denmark (Danish) 6:00 PM 117
BBC Radio (UK) channel 6:00 PM 126
Canal + Spain (Spanish-Spain) 6:00 PM 131
BeTV (French) 6:00 PM 143
NTV + Russia (Russian) 6:00 PM 147
Westwood One (Spanish-Latin America) 6:00 PM 181
Seattle Seahawks Home Broadcast 6:00 PM 123
Pittsburgh Steelers Home Broadcast 6:00 PM 125

With all those options, I feel almost like I'll be missing out by watching it on television.

As if Phil Wasn't Enough

2006-02-02T17:57:00.000-06:00

Just like last year, Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow this morning thus securing six more weeks of winter. I never knew, however, that Phil had some Groundhog competition. I'd always thought Phil was sort of the national groundhog, but apparently there are some nineteen other groundhogs that predict the remainder of winter.

Apparently Stanton Island Chuck didn't see his shadow. So we got that goin' for us...

The Future of Photography

2006-02-02T17:38:00.000-06:00

The NY Times' David Pogue has an interesting article on what's new in the world of photography. The entire piece is a great read, but one this tidbit, though simple, seems like an incredible advancement:

Canon is working on even more sophisticated recognition software. One, called Blink Shot, would prevent the camera from taking the picture when your subject's eyes are closed. A companion feature, called Smile Shot, waits to fire until your subject manages a grin.

I know quite a few people who almost always blink during a photo. Even though in the age of digital photography there's no real attachment to a bad photo, never having to worry about someone blinking is an awesome development. <----(That's a bad pun!)

One Year and Counting

2006-01-31T16:31:00.000-06:00

Looking at my archives today, I noticed that it's been a year and a day since I began Portsider. Considering all that's happened since then, it seems like I've been blogging for much longer than that. In that year, Portsider has seen 8,000 visitors - a milestone surpassed just as I began this post. Additionally, the Google ads (in green on the right) have earned me $63.24 - money I haven't actually seen yet since Google doesn't pay until one reaches one-hundred dollars. Every time a visitor clicks on an advertisement, I get paid anywhere from three cents to 75 cents. That said, don't be afraid to click away at the ads. Also, if you have time, take a look through the archives for the year that was in Portsider.

Thanks for reading. Hope you'll join me for another year.

All in a Day's Work

2006-01-29T15:07:00.000-06:00

Coming up on 24 hours since the ants entered their new home. We've been impressed with how fast they've worked, but it seems like two or three are doing all the work. The others just climb the walls or huddle in a mass just above a tunnel entrance. I guess it's just like life, though. Some individuals are go getters, some waste energy without accomplishing anything, and others are content to be lazy.

The Power of an Internet Search

2006-01-28T22:23:00.000-06:00

Little Green Footballs shows the vastly different search results you'll get from searching Google for the term "tiananmen" in China versus the rest of the world. Not good, Google. Not good.

They're Here!

2006-01-28T17:43:00.000-06:00

The ants that I ordered a few weeks ago finally arrived in a small envelope.
Surprisingly, it looks like only one died during the shipment. They're not easy to count, but it looks like there's about nineteen not including the dead one.
Only one got loose as I dumped them into their space-age ant habitat. Luckily for me, I was able to catch him with the tube and bring him safely into his new home. They do have pinchers, and aren't afraid of biting anything that gets in their way.

I poked a few holes into the gel which according to the directions will help the ants to get their tunnels started. The directions also note, however, that they take a while to become acclimated to their new environment and will take 24-48 hours before they begin working. Should be interesting.

UPDATE 10:27 p.m.

So much for 24 to begin work. Less than five hours in and the majority of ants are working on two tunnels that are almost an inch deep at the moment.

James Frey and the Kingdom of Oprah

2006-01-26T17:12:00.000-06:00

I hate to admit it, but I'm watching Oprah right now. James Frey is on along with his editor discussing the validity of his "memoir" A Million Little Pieces. Oprah is on the rampage going after the editor for not doing enough to make sure his story was true. I tuned in about ten minutes ago and Frey hasn't said anything yet. He just keeps sipping away at his glass of water. Oprah notes that she is "embarrassed and disappointed" for including the book in her club.

They're leading into each segment with various journalists discussing the validity of Frey's work. Maureen Dowd of the New York Times snivels that Frey's work "should be banished from the Kingdom of Oprah." The kingdom of Oprah! Give me a break. Dowd's just peeved that her latest book bombed on the bestseller lists.

Frank Rich, another NY Times columnist, comes on to discuss "truthiness." He makes a few good points about popular culture and what we call reality. As an example, he cites Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey claiming to show their real-life marriage on television even though there's clearly an element of fiction involved.

Finally, at the end of the broadcast, Frey is given the chance to say a few words. He speaks incredibly slow, but even so they should have given him a few more opportunities to respond to the allegations hurled at him throughout the show. I'm guessing he was given a chance to speak during the opening twenty minutes I missed, but we can't forget: he's the author. Without him there's nothing to discuss. Frey and Oprah offer a few cliche statements about the truth setting you free and the show is over.

A few thoughts:

1. Oprah wants the story to be about her. "Forget Frey - I'm the one who has been wronged here" seems to be her viewpoint.

2. I've changed my stance on the Oprah Book Club over the years. At first I was against it completely. "People should be smart enough to choose their own books," I'd say. After a few years of watching the club at work, however, I must admit that it does cause people to read more - a wonderful thing. And while I don't fault Oprah, I do fault the legions of Oprah worshipers (see Dowd's comment above) who won't read or buy anything unless it carries her stamp of approval.

3. If I ever have a novel published, I'm not going anywhere near Oprah or her book club.

Another Season for The Office

2006-01-26T05:43:00.000-06:00

I was skeptical about the American version of The Office at first, but it's easily one of the best comedy offerings on television. USA Today reports that the show will be back for another season of 22 episodes. Still, if you haven't seen the original British version you're missing out.

Miss America '06

2006-01-21T19:12:00.000-06:00

7:14 - The party has started. All fifty have been introduced and the fellow from Desperate Housewives is the host. Ashley and I have both selected our top tens though I have to admit as they were introducing themselves I wrote down about twenty-five as possibles.

My top ten in alphabetical order: California, Hawaii, New Hampshire, North Carolina, Pennsylvania, South Carolina, Tennessee, Texas, Washington, and Rhode Island. Actually that's not alphabetical order. I had to include Rhode Island as I only had nine "for sures." I really wanted to include Washington D.C., but there just wasn't space.

Ashley's: Arkansas, Hawaii, Minnesota, Nevada, New York, North Carolina, Pennsylvania, South Carolina, Texas, and Washington.

7:25 - Now for the real top ten. But first, the judges. The ones I recognize: Leeza Gibbons, the mother from Malcom in the Middle (I know she's' from WI), Jerry Rice, and finally the dead wife from Desperate Housewives.

The actual top ten: District of Columbia (crap!), South Carolina, Oklahoma, Virginia, Georgia, Texas, Arkansas, Pennsylvania, Alabama, and Florida. The host threatens to go to a commercial break before revealing the tenth girl, but then says "I'm just kidding, I wouldn't Seacrest you" referring to the host of American Idol.

Ashley gets four of the top ten and I get three. Score: Ashley 40 - Lucas 30 . Up next: swimsuit.

7:50 - They breeze through the swimsuit portion in less than ten minutes. Most look anorexic. The basketball game starts in ten minutes.

7:58 - Now for the evening gowns. The host - I still don't know his name - notes that the dresses won't be judged, instead how the contestants wear them is what's important. Most have their fathers escort them down the stairs and Ashley remarks, "All the dad's look the same." She's right. Though neither of us have chosen a favorite yet, Ashley is rooting against Virginia. "I don't like her," Ashley says, "Ick!" That's the last competition, however, before they narrow it down to five.

My top five: Washington D.C., Texas, South Carolina, Virginia, and Pennsylvania.

Ashley's: Texas, Arkansas, Pennsylvania, Alabama, and South Carolina

The actual: Virginia, Oklahoma, Washington D.C., Georgia, and Alabama

The score: Ashley 45 - Lucas 40

8:20 - Miss Virginia begins the talent portion singing a Broadway tune. The sweeping camera angles can't help the fact she's not a talented singer.

Miss Oklahoma is next. Ballet dancing - snoozefest. "Can I check the score of the game?" Guess not.

Miss D.C. does a tap dance routine. The music is so loud you can't hear any tapping whatsoever. Is it planned that way? I'm guessing so.

Miss Georgia plays the piano quite well. We learned in a previous segment that she's half Chinese, half American. I can't help but think of the short story, "Two Kinds" by Amy Tan. Ms. Georgia's piano playing goes better than that of the protagonist of in "Two Kinds."

Miss Alabama does another ballet routine. I'm ambivalent.

My top three: Virginia, Washington D.C., and Georgia

Ashley's: Georgia, Oklahoma, and Alabama

And the actual: Alabama, Oklahoma, and Georgia

The score: Ashley 54 - Me 43. Ashley's gloating.

They also breeze through the final questions which are all softballs. Nothing enlightening from any of them.

My top three in order: 1. Oklahoma 2. Georgia 3. Alabama

Ashley's: 1. Georgia 2. Alabama 3. Oklahoma

8:59: It's almost over. It actually went pretty quickly. And the winners are:

2nd runner up: Alabama
1st runner up: Georgia
Miss America: Oklahoma

I squeak out a victory by putting them in exactly the right order. Miss Oklahoma is crying. They play a maudlin recording of the "Here she is" song. You'd have thought they could have found someone to sing it live. The final credits roll.

Final score: Me 58 - Ashley 54

Now it's time for the game.

You Cannot Be Serious!

2006-01-21T16:30:00.000-06:00

Upset doesn't even begin to describe it. I hear there's widespread rioting and looting throughout the streets of Fargo.

Here She Is...

2006-01-21T16:25:00.000-06:00

Miss America airs tonight at 7:00 Central on CMT. Just watching could be boring, but Ashley and I make a competition of it by selecting our own winners as the pageant progresses - our own version of fantasy Miss America. A boring beauty pageant becomes an interactive game. Though we've played since college, it appears the event organizers are hoping to snag a few viewers through audience participation. The official site is offering a printable scorecard which allows you to rate the contestants on your own using the same criteria as the judges.

According to an article in today's NY Times, the pageant's ratings have gone down over 50% in the last decade. In addition, for the first time ever they're holding it in Las Vegas instead of Atlantic City. Thus far, it sounds like a successful move:

While the ultimate test of that decision will lie in the ratings for this year's pageant, to be broadcast live Saturday night on Country Music Television, there are already signs that the move has infused the contest with new life. Each night this week, several thousand tourists have bypassed shows featuring artists like Celine Dion and Cirque du Soleil to spend as much as $70 a person to watch the judging of the early rounds of the talent and swimsuit competitions, which count toward the final result. The actual pageant is sold out.

Not that fantasy Miss America won't be entertaining enough, but I'm also going to "live blog" the event. Check back during the broadcast for updates on the "competition" and also observations on the real competition. If it's brutally dull, however, I might concede victory to Ashley and go watch TV in the other room. I hear there's a good basketball game on.

Songs that Sound the Same

2006-01-21T10:13:00.000-06:00

Check out this mash-up of Green Day, Oasis, Travis, and Eminem called "Boulevard of Broken Songs." I'm impressed by the fellows who are able to pick out parts of these songs and combine them with such fluidity.

In this day and age...

2006-01-18T21:46:00.000-06:00

It can't be easy to go into opposing arenas with a name like this.

Cashing in on Liberal Professors

2006-01-18T21:14:00.000-06:00

At UCLA:

A fledgling alumni group headed by a former campus Republican leader is offering students payments of up to $100 per class to provide information on instructors who are "abusive, one-sided or off-topic" in advocating political ideologies.

The year-old Bruin Alumni Assn. says its "Exposing UCLA's Radical Professors" initiative takes aim at faculty "actively proselytizing their extreme views in the classroom, whether or not the commentary is relevant to the class topic." Although the group says it is concerned about radical professors of any political stripe, it has named an initial "Dirty 30" of teachers it identifies with left-wing or liberal causes

While I don't agree with cash incentives for outing liberal professors, there's no doubt that the majority of those teaching in college classrooms have leftist leanings. Reading this article brought to mind two professors I had at Central. One would connect crooked to Shakespearian characters to members of the Bush administration and Bush himself on an almost weekly basis. Another had his door decorated with a sole 8x10 photo of Bush which featured a red thumb tack planted squarely on George's nose. That'd be two-hundred bucks right there.

Teacher Man

2006-01-18T20:31:00.000-06:00

About a hundred pages in, it's turning out to be a great read. I wonder how many teachers got the book for Christmas this year?

Troubles in Badgerland

2006-01-18T20:09:00.000-06:00

Almost halftime of the Badger game against Ohio State tonight and Bo's crew is without three regulars in the playing rotation. Greg Steimsma is out for medical reasons (though they won't divulge the reason), Marcus Landry is out because according to his father he didn't turn in a paper for one of his classes, and Brian Butch just sprained his ankle. It does look like he'll be able to return to the game, but he doesn't look close to 100%. Winning on the road is tough enough in the Big Ten with all your players. Playing three short, a win tonight would be a small miracle.

UPDATE: Badgers lose. Ohio State has a great team and killed Wisconsin with their second half threes. Finally, you heard it hear first: Alando Tucker's free throw shooting will cost the Badgers at least one close game this year.

27 Teachers in One Home

2006-01-17T21:47:00.000-06:00

According to an article in the Washington Post, ants could be the first non-human teachers:

The ants were only looking for food, but the researchers said the careful way the leaders led followers -- thereby turning them into leaders in their own right -- marked the Temnothorax albipennis ant as the very first example of a non-human animal exhibiting teaching behavior.

"Within the field of animal behavior, we would say an animal is a teacher if it modifies behavior in the presence of another, at cost to itself, so another individual can learn more quickly," said Nigel R. Franks, professor of animal behavior and ecology, whose paper on the ant educators was published last week in the journal Nature.

Franks said careful analysis, and a great many hours of videotape, proved that the ants were teaching one another. For example, if the leaders were to race to the food on their own, he said, they would reach it four times as fast than if they had a follower tagging along. Even grabbing a follower by the mouth and physically lugging it to the food, as the ants are sometimes prone to do, was three times as fast as the teaching exercise. But the ants persisted with the tutorial, Franks said, presumably because followers that were carried were trucked with their heads turned upside down facing backward -- hardly the best vantage point from which to master a new route.

The ants appeared to follow pedagogical techniques that good human teachers have used for centuries. The lesson was highly interactive and proceeded at a pace set by the followers. If the gap between leader and follower increased too much, the leader slowed down. If it was too close, the leader accelerated.

It only makes sense that Ashley and I, two teachers, will welcome into our home a whole new colony of teachers. I guess I should clarify and say that I'm welcoming them in - Ashley's ambivalent at best. I sent three dollars off to Utah over a week ago and in return I should be receiving 25 Harvestor ants. Now if only they'd just get here. It should be any day now.

Even the Cover Looks Like an Advertisement

2006-01-17T21:06:00.000-06:00

Do you think it's a coincidence that both Time and Newsweek have Bode Miller on the cover this week? Call me cynical, but it seems like a transparent attempt to create a star for a sporting event where nobody knows the participants. Go ask someone on the street if they can name three athletes who'll compete in Turin (or is it Torino?) and I guarantee they'll come up short. I love sports and competition as much as anyone, but even I can't name three. I'm pretty sure Sasha Cohen is skating, or is it Sasha Baron Cohen? I'm sure I'll watch the games occasionally, but I'm making the prediction that these games will generate some of the lowest television ratings ever for the Olympics. That said, including Ali G as part of the skating competition definitely wouldn't reduce the television audience.

Zero Hour

2006-01-15T15:43:00.000-06:00

As you've noticed, posting has been light of late. Yesterday I was in Madison to see the Badgers beat Northwestern and today has been spent grading student work and preparing for finals week. I'm taking a short break at the moment, but my goal is to get all my work completed before seven. What happens at seven, you ask? The season premiere of "24" on FOX. Get it now, or following the story will get increasingly difficult as the season progresses.

The Sunday NY Times has a nice article on Carlos Bernard (Tony Almeida to show fans) and his character's longevity. Though he's the only actor other than Kiefer Sutherland to have appeared in every season, it looks like this could be his last:

As a cast member of a show known for being highly capricious with the lives of its characters, Mr. Bernard is hedging his bets. He's shopping around a dramatic series, set in Miami, with a Cuban-American lead character. "The show is not about him being Hispanic, but it does deal with his back story of having shelved his culture to get ahead in the American world and having to reconnect with that Spanish culture he put aside," Mr. Bernard said. "My run on '24' is going to come to an end, obviously. The show is going to end or I'm going to be killed off."